Are my standards too high?
(No, this is not a post about guys or dating, in case you were wondering)
I do not know if I would describe myself as a perfectionist. I actually don't think I would. I work really hard, but there are some days and experiences when I'm not aiming for perfect. But I am constantly aiming for my best.
It's funny when you compare standards:
1/3 is phenomenal for a batting average
52% can win you a presidential election
...that would also be a decent approval rating
In high school music competitions, only people who score 99 or 100 will be accepted into their All-State organizations
Only a near perfect SAT score will get you into an Ivy League school
You want your surgeon to have a close-to-zero mortality rate, right?
Obviously, it is not just about the numbers, and you can't go across the board and say what is "acceptable," "good," "excellent,"and "superb."
But I think my standards may be too high. I have a week to go before the written part of my PhD comps, which will be next Thursday and Friday. I have been preparing for months: doing the reading, writing, synthesizing, talking about it to anyone who will listen. On Monday, I woke up in the middle of the night with a nightmare about the exam. I don't remember it now, but I couldn't get my mind to calm down for a while. And it led to two days straight of just nerves and worrying. I think part of the mental challenge is dealing with the fact that this is the culmination of years of work. Another part of it is knowing that I have over 100 books and articles shuffling around my brain, clamoring to be remembered. And it made for a rough couple of days. I didn't quite hit my track workout on Tuesday either, which I attributed to the race and comps.
On Wednesday, I met with a friend of mine who is in the program and took his comps last year. I asked if he would ask me a few questions, so I could practice discussing some answers. And, over an hour later, I had hit a number of topics. And I didn't struggle for ideas: I spoke freely and was able to draw from a number of different books.
It was a big relief. And today I did some good reading and clarified some information about some medieval church councils, which was really helpful. And all of that worrying lessened - it didn't go away, but it lessened, at least for a little bit.
A lot of this has made me think my standards can be really really high, maybe even unreasonable at times. I expect to commit this stuff to memory, and I expect to be successful in running. Consistently. And maybe that is the issue - I want to be consistent, and when I have an off day, I am disappointed. I am sure that I am not alone with this - I am writing to a community of go-getters!
And now, with just over a week to go, I am getting my head on straight. I am pouring over my notes, putting it all together, and hoping that even if I set my standards really high, I will meet them.
Game on!
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Monday, October 17, 2011
A Negative Split Convert: Boo! Run for Life 10k
After a September set of 5ks, it was time for the 10k in
October. I had signed up to do the
Boo! Run for Like 10k in East Potomac Park. I was really excited to turn to the 10k, because I do think
I have more potential to do well in that distance compared to the 5k. I was also excited because the weather had finally cooled, and they were calling for 50 degrees for race morning.
Everything this morning in regard to the metro went well (which hasn't been the case lately pre-race), and I arrived with 40 minutes to spare. Got in a nice warm-up on the course, which meant that I got to preview both mile 1 and mile 6 on the out and back course. I have actually run this course several times, as it also hosts the December Jingle All the Way 10k, which I've run 3 times. But, the weather then has always been a bit raw and this was gorgeous.
I was happy to get a good position in the second row of the starting line. And when the gun went off, felt great. Sarah told me to aim for just under sub-7 pace. I went thorugh the first mile in 6:50 and though I should probably back off. I was in 5th, and then whoosh, 2 women passed me. And one of them was wearing a tutu and carrying a wand. I mean, come on! I don't want to be passed by a fairy. But it as too early to get worked up over it - I'll deal with her later, I thought. Hit mile 2 at 14:00, which meant I had actually slowed to a 7:10 mile. C'mon, gotta even out this pace. I was hoping to go sub 43 (current PR was 44:45 from last December at the beginning of ITBS). At this point, I wasn't sure if that was going to happen. Even still, I felt really comfortable and knew that I had enough in the tank that I could really move in the second 5k. I have to say, the course was gorgeous: we ran along the harbor and it was just a very pretty morning. Things spread out nicely, there was a lot of room, and it was actually pretty quiet as we moved along. I reached the 5k mark in 21:45 (7:00 pace). I tried to pick it up, but then I hit mile 4 at 28:00, still being very consistent at that 7:00 mark. I picked it up a little, and I think I ran 6:57 for mile 5. At that point, I was bound and determined to pass at least one girl. I just took off, and I although I wasn't sure how smart it was to "kick" with 1.2 left, but I was going to do it. Last month, I did 6 x 1 mile average 6:42 pace - this was what I was practicing for! I just kept going and going, and it finally this one girl (not the tutu one - she must've been clocking 6:40s, which is pretty remarkable) was within 20 yards of me. It took forever, but I was just behind her at the 6 mile mark. Thankfully, I was able to pass her comfortably, and felt that she wouldn't be able to react back. I just kept going and going, and could not believe my eyes when I crossed the finish line:
42:48
6:54 pace
Almost a 2 minute PR!
This was fantastic in so many ways, particularly because I ran a negative split! I ran the second 5k almost 45 seconds faster than the first 5k! I have never been able to do that - I always positive split, so that was really exciting too. Overall, I was 6th woman and I won my age group (first time doing that in DC!): 25-29. Good prize too: $20 and a $10 gift card to Pacers Running Stores. It was a great race overall, and I was just really pleased with my performance. I may not have caught the tutu, but it certainly was a great victory in DC.
Friday, October 14, 2011
Meeting an Olympian
Thanks to Pacers Running Store in Alexandria, I had the privilege of meeting 2008 Olympian Magdalena Lewy Boulet. She did a talk on injury prevention and about her training for the Olympics, training through pregnancy, and working on form and making the little tweaks that have helped her to continue to PR at age 38!
I had heard about this talk almost a month ago, and I was just so excited. Once i got into the world of running, I became so immersed in all of the elite runners: their stats, their background, upcoming races, etc. Naturally, I had read a lot about Magdalena, and was very excited to meet her. She is an Olympian and one of the fastest female American marathoners of all time. Opportunities like that don't come along all of the time, so I was just thrilled. She gave her talk, and then there was an opportunity for meet and greet after. We chatted a bit about California (she lives in Oakland and also was in Santa Cruz for a race this summer), and then I asked her a couple of questions about her favorite pre-race workouts:For the marathon: 8 x 1 mile 15 seconds faster than goal marathon pace with one minute recovery in between
For 5ks, 10ks: 8 x 1k at 5k pace with equal recovery (so, if you run the 1ks in 4:10, recovery for 4:10).
Good luck as you get ready for Houston (and hopefully London!) 2012!
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
In the time leading up to a marathon...
A series of questions rush around your head:
-Can I really go that far?
-Can I really run at my desired pace, for 26.2 miles, even if I've never been able to do it in practice?
-I couldn't even do 20 miles at that pace, will it really happen?
And somehow, on Marathon Day, it comes together. The body knows what to do, even if it has never been put to that specific test before. All of the types of training link up in perfect union and harmony, and we take off, stringing each mile together at that pace. And in the 3-4 months of preparation, things didn't gel quite like that, but on the big day, it did.
I need to remind myself of that. And remember that sometimes I may be my own worst enemy.
And with just over 2 weeks out from my comps and with all of my books done, I am now studying. And there are some days when I can spout out quite a lot on late medieval devotion. And there are other days when after a few sentences...it seems like there isn't much left.
I just need to remind myself that:
- Every study day is not perfect
- It is all about the culmination of preparation
- It may not happen in practice, but I can pull it together on that big day.
I even did some reading about Kara Goucher. Absolutely phenomenal world-class runner, but struggles with self-doubt and "negative chatter." And look what she has managed to accomplished once she's knocked out the doubting voice - her own.
Just over 2 weeks until the big day, and I just need to remember that I knocked off 9 minutes in Boston, ran a 3:27 after much adversity, and I will do the same very soon with these exams.
-Can I really go that far?
-Can I really run at my desired pace, for 26.2 miles, even if I've never been able to do it in practice?
-I couldn't even do 20 miles at that pace, will it really happen?
And somehow, on Marathon Day, it comes together. The body knows what to do, even if it has never been put to that specific test before. All of the types of training link up in perfect union and harmony, and we take off, stringing each mile together at that pace. And in the 3-4 months of preparation, things didn't gel quite like that, but on the big day, it did.
I need to remind myself of that. And remember that sometimes I may be my own worst enemy.
And with just over 2 weeks out from my comps and with all of my books done, I am now studying. And there are some days when I can spout out quite a lot on late medieval devotion. And there are other days when after a few sentences...it seems like there isn't much left.
I just need to remind myself that:
- Every study day is not perfect
- It is all about the culmination of preparation
- It may not happen in practice, but I can pull it together on that big day.
I even did some reading about Kara Goucher. Absolutely phenomenal world-class runner, but struggles with self-doubt and "negative chatter." And look what she has managed to accomplished once she's knocked out the doubting voice - her own.
Just over 2 weeks until the big day, and I just need to remember that I knocked off 9 minutes in Boston, ran a 3:27 after much adversity, and I will do the same very soon with these exams.
Monday, October 3, 2011
Charging into October
I ran 161 miles last month. My cross training was so-so - that is something that I need to work on reeling back in next month. But I also read about 30 books in the process, so that is the big achievement of the month and I ran a PR in the 5k.
And now that it is October, it is time to get my act in gear. I've got a 10k in 2 weeks (Boo! Run for Life 10k in DC), and that is my next race.
On Saturday, we had our first real taste of fall - 50 degrees and rain. And I loved it. It was the first time I wore short sleeves since I was in California this summer. It was nice not to "melt" halfway through the run. And today was a hard run: 2 mile warm up, 7 mile tempo, 2 mile cool down. I still have not mastered tempo runs yet, even though I've been doing them for over a year. Somehow, it is hard to lock into those perfect paces just beneath the limit and hold onto it for 30-60 minutes. And I have done a lot of them, but not all go smoothly. Some, I crash and burn and can't pick it up. Other times, I am checking my watch too often to see if I'm close to being done.
Saturday was better. I actually averaged 7:13 pace for the 7 mile tempo, which I was pleased about. Even though that it slower than I am hoping my 10k pace will be on October 16th, I was happy about it.
Then on Sunday, I did a long run of 18 miles. I didn't time myself, but was pretty pleased, seeing as that my longest run since Boston in April. It was a super hilly course, but again, the fall weather was just wonderful - it was beckoning for me to keep going and stay outside.
Needless to say, my legs were pretty beaten up by the end of the weekend - I had run 29 miles in about 24 hours. So, it was probably a good time to work out my brain instead.
I finished my comps reading yesterday! I've now read over a hundred books on early medieval history, early modern history, and late medieval religion and society. The written part of my exam is October 27-28th, with the oral part in November. So, I have just about 3.5 weeks to just review at this point. I am very relieved - it was my hope to be finished by this Wednesday, so I am right on track. Now is the big task of compiling my notes and synthesizing the information: connecting themes and topics, as well as evaluating the "state of the field," meaning what have historians done so far in this area and what still needs to be done. The ground work has been done, I've done my base training, and now is the time for sharpening.
And now that it is October, it is time to get my act in gear. I've got a 10k in 2 weeks (Boo! Run for Life 10k in DC), and that is my next race.
On Saturday, we had our first real taste of fall - 50 degrees and rain. And I loved it. It was the first time I wore short sleeves since I was in California this summer. It was nice not to "melt" halfway through the run. And today was a hard run: 2 mile warm up, 7 mile tempo, 2 mile cool down. I still have not mastered tempo runs yet, even though I've been doing them for over a year. Somehow, it is hard to lock into those perfect paces just beneath the limit and hold onto it for 30-60 minutes. And I have done a lot of them, but not all go smoothly. Some, I crash and burn and can't pick it up. Other times, I am checking my watch too often to see if I'm close to being done.
Saturday was better. I actually averaged 7:13 pace for the 7 mile tempo, which I was pleased about. Even though that it slower than I am hoping my 10k pace will be on October 16th, I was happy about it.
Then on Sunday, I did a long run of 18 miles. I didn't time myself, but was pretty pleased, seeing as that my longest run since Boston in April. It was a super hilly course, but again, the fall weather was just wonderful - it was beckoning for me to keep going and stay outside.
Needless to say, my legs were pretty beaten up by the end of the weekend - I had run 29 miles in about 24 hours. So, it was probably a good time to work out my brain instead.
I finished my comps reading yesterday! I've now read over a hundred books on early medieval history, early modern history, and late medieval religion and society. The written part of my exam is October 27-28th, with the oral part in November. So, I have just about 3.5 weeks to just review at this point. I am very relieved - it was my hope to be finished by this Wednesday, so I am right on track. Now is the big task of compiling my notes and synthesizing the information: connecting themes and topics, as well as evaluating the "state of the field," meaning what have historians done so far in this area and what still needs to be done. The ground work has been done, I've done my base training, and now is the time for sharpening.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Hardest and Best Workout Ever
Last month, I had a tough workout of 5 x 1 mile repeats starting at 6:55 pace and getting progressively faster. While I did each of the 5, I couldn't quite pick it up in the final ones, and even slowed down on the last repeat. It was hot, it was hard, and ultimately, I fell a little short of the expectations. But, I told myself that when the time came around to try it again, I would be ready: "I am excited about the prospect of rewriting how this workout goes and getting a second chance for success!"
Well, today was the day to try again, and with a little extra. Instead of 5 x 1 mile, this was the task:
2.5 mile warm-up; 6 x 150 meters; 6 x 1 mile; Start at 6:55 and cut down 5-7 seconds per mile; 500 meter recovery jog between each interval; 2.5 mile cool-down. Total= 13 miles
Certainly a bit tougher than the last time! But, it was only 68 this time, and I was determined to get it right today.
Last time: 6:56, 6:51, 6:46, 6:42, 6:46. (Average pace: 6:48)
This time: 6:54, 6:48, 6:43, 6:42, 6:39, 6:36. (Average pace: 6:43)
Yeah baby! And the last 3 were really hard. I was really pushing in the last 400 of each one just to keep going and hit my necessary splits. I knew, I knew, I knew that the second go at this would be better. Still difficult to accomplish, but it was an accomplishment! What a great way to start the day!
My comprehensive exams are one month from today. And a month ago, this workout wouldn't have happened. That is how I know that I will do well with the exams. A month's worth of work can make a major difference - and that what this coming month is - working and working for my hardest test ever!
Well, today was the day to try again, and with a little extra. Instead of 5 x 1 mile, this was the task:
2.5 mile warm-up; 6 x 150 meters; 6 x 1 mile; Start at 6:55 and cut down 5-7 seconds per mile; 500 meter recovery jog between each interval; 2.5 mile cool-down. Total= 13 miles
Certainly a bit tougher than the last time! But, it was only 68 this time, and I was determined to get it right today.
Last time: 6:56, 6:51, 6:46, 6:42, 6:46. (Average pace: 6:48)
This time: 6:54, 6:48, 6:43, 6:42, 6:39, 6:36. (Average pace: 6:43)
Yeah baby! And the last 3 were really hard. I was really pushing in the last 400 of each one just to keep going and hit my necessary splits. I knew, I knew, I knew that the second go at this would be better. Still difficult to accomplish, but it was an accomplishment! What a great way to start the day!
My comprehensive exams are one month from today. And a month ago, this workout wouldn't have happened. That is how I know that I will do well with the exams. A month's worth of work can make a major difference - and that what this coming month is - working and working for my hardest test ever!
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Running with Trust - Clarendon Day 5k PR
"Blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord." Jeremiah 17:7
I was re-reading Ryan Hall's Running with Joy for the 3rd or 4th time last night as I settled into bed, on the night before my last 5k of the season. Ryan Hall quoted Jeremiah in his final month of preparation for Boston 2010, and I thought that was a great phrase for me to reflect on.
I needed to put a little more trust in God, in my training, and in myself. I felt that I had let myself get a little shaken and lost a little confidence after a couple of harder races (Pentagon 5k 2 weeks ago and the NY Women's 10k in June). And even though my workouts have been going well, I have felt a bit doubtful too. Last Saturday, my tempo run was bellow normal standards. On Tuesday, I had a raceweek workout: 2.5 mile w/u, 6 x 150 m strides, 2k cutdown (starting at 6:55 pace and getting faster), 800 recovery, 8 x 300 m (aiming between 64-66 for each) with 150 m recovery, 2.5 mile c/d = 9 miles. I had a hard time with the cutdown, and it took effort to go below 6:55 pace. The 300s were better: 67, 67, 66, 66, 65, 64, 65, 64. They were sub 6 pace, which gave me some hope that I could pick things up a bit this weekend. On Thursday, I had a slow 6 mile run that just felt like a lot of work. The doubt crept back in. But on Friday, I did a 3 mile shakeout run in the pouring rain and felt absolutely exhilarated. It was time to do something great.
And so as I was reading last night, I was caught up in the hopeful words that Ryan Hall expressed as he prepared for his marathon. And when I got to that quote, I read it, smiled, stopped reading, and went to bed, reflecting on it.
I woke up twice in the night, including after a nightmare that I missed the race (which is actually one of the first running nightmares I've ever had). But I did my warmup this morning, and was pleased about the cooler temperature (69). I took the metro out and read on the train, grooving to my happy playlist and just trying to relax. I tend to get so worked up, that I hoped to just distract myself on my way there. Arrived with about 20 minutes to spare, dropped off my bag and jogged part of the course. I did the 10k of this race (Clarendon Day 5k/10k) and I remembered the first mile being a fast downhill. Well, as I previewed it, I forgot that it goes downhill twice: down, then flattens out, then down again. Trotted back to the start, and bang - we were off!
The past couple of races, I have felt rather breathless from the start, which does not feel great. But this time, I felt much more in control. Even with this downhill, I just went with it, didn't get out of breath, didn't feel overwhelmed as people rushed around me, I just went. I could see the lead women way out in front and I figured they would run somewhere in the 18-19 minute range.
Went through the first mile in 6:19. Wow, that is fast, but Sarah told me not to freak out with the first mile split, and that things would eventually even out. Kept on going, passed a few guys and just wanted to hold steady. Mile 2 in 12:51 - I had slowed down a little, but this pace felt much more manageable. The turnaround came soon after, I could count about 10 or so women in front of me. I told myself I wouldn't try to pick things up until around 15 minutes. And then, I worked on passing women, one at a time. I think I passed at least 3. Then, I was on the heels of another, but I wanted to be careful with my surge. No point in surging if she was just going to respond harder. I got to a point where I felt assured that I could make a strong move, and then I did. There was 3 mile mark, and just .1 to go - which sounds like a nice small decimal, but when running it, it is still 45-50 seconds left to go. I was all smiles as I came into the finish line, because I knew what awaited me:
20:23
A 22 second PR!
7th woman (out of 392)
44/686 overall.
It was great. I felt relaxed, and while the pace was hard, I didn't feel awful either. It was the best I've felt in a race in a while. It was just enjoyable. And, once I started, I knew that I was going to be able to do it - to PR, to run hard and strong, and to get the time I have been working months for (goal for the season was to reach 20:30) - and that was my last 5k of the fall.
It worked, it worked, it worked. The training paid off - even when training days weren't perfect. I ran with trust, and felt the joy I was searching for.
I was re-reading Ryan Hall's Running with Joy for the 3rd or 4th time last night as I settled into bed, on the night before my last 5k of the season. Ryan Hall quoted Jeremiah in his final month of preparation for Boston 2010, and I thought that was a great phrase for me to reflect on.
I needed to put a little more trust in God, in my training, and in myself. I felt that I had let myself get a little shaken and lost a little confidence after a couple of harder races (Pentagon 5k 2 weeks ago and the NY Women's 10k in June). And even though my workouts have been going well, I have felt a bit doubtful too. Last Saturday, my tempo run was bellow normal standards. On Tuesday, I had a raceweek workout: 2.5 mile w/u, 6 x 150 m strides, 2k cutdown (starting at 6:55 pace and getting faster), 800 recovery, 8 x 300 m (aiming between 64-66 for each) with 150 m recovery, 2.5 mile c/d = 9 miles. I had a hard time with the cutdown, and it took effort to go below 6:55 pace. The 300s were better: 67, 67, 66, 66, 65, 64, 65, 64. They were sub 6 pace, which gave me some hope that I could pick things up a bit this weekend. On Thursday, I had a slow 6 mile run that just felt like a lot of work. The doubt crept back in. But on Friday, I did a 3 mile shakeout run in the pouring rain and felt absolutely exhilarated. It was time to do something great.
And so as I was reading last night, I was caught up in the hopeful words that Ryan Hall expressed as he prepared for his marathon. And when I got to that quote, I read it, smiled, stopped reading, and went to bed, reflecting on it.
I woke up twice in the night, including after a nightmare that I missed the race (which is actually one of the first running nightmares I've ever had). But I did my warmup this morning, and was pleased about the cooler temperature (69). I took the metro out and read on the train, grooving to my happy playlist and just trying to relax. I tend to get so worked up, that I hoped to just distract myself on my way there. Arrived with about 20 minutes to spare, dropped off my bag and jogged part of the course. I did the 10k of this race (Clarendon Day 5k/10k) and I remembered the first mile being a fast downhill. Well, as I previewed it, I forgot that it goes downhill twice: down, then flattens out, then down again. Trotted back to the start, and bang - we were off!
The past couple of races, I have felt rather breathless from the start, which does not feel great. But this time, I felt much more in control. Even with this downhill, I just went with it, didn't get out of breath, didn't feel overwhelmed as people rushed around me, I just went. I could see the lead women way out in front and I figured they would run somewhere in the 18-19 minute range.
Went through the first mile in 6:19. Wow, that is fast, but Sarah told me not to freak out with the first mile split, and that things would eventually even out. Kept on going, passed a few guys and just wanted to hold steady. Mile 2 in 12:51 - I had slowed down a little, but this pace felt much more manageable. The turnaround came soon after, I could count about 10 or so women in front of me. I told myself I wouldn't try to pick things up until around 15 minutes. And then, I worked on passing women, one at a time. I think I passed at least 3. Then, I was on the heels of another, but I wanted to be careful with my surge. No point in surging if she was just going to respond harder. I got to a point where I felt assured that I could make a strong move, and then I did. There was 3 mile mark, and just .1 to go - which sounds like a nice small decimal, but when running it, it is still 45-50 seconds left to go. I was all smiles as I came into the finish line, because I knew what awaited me:
20:23
A 22 second PR!
7th woman (out of 392)
44/686 overall.
It worked, it worked, it worked. The training paid off - even when training days weren't perfect. I ran with trust, and felt the joy I was searching for.
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Indefatigable
in-de-fat-i-ga-ble adjective: unable to be tired or fatigued.
In my book that I read yesterday in preparation for comps (just under 6 weeks to go, if you're keeping track), So Great a Light, So Great a Smoke: The Beguin Heretics of Languedoc, the author Louise Berhman used the word indefatigable several times to discuss the relentless attitude of this religious movement.
I kept saying it to myself - in part to get the pronunciation correct (it's hard, right?), and in part because I couldn't stop thinking about its meaning.
I like that word a lot, and I wonder if sometimes we are called on to be indefatigable. We practice and practice running, doing long runs, tempo runs, intervals that get faster and faster with each subsequent lap, in the hopes that even as the hours and miles pass, we will not tire. We seek to find the perfect balance in challenging ourselves and improving our threshold, but at the same time not allowing ourselves to burn out from the intensity. It is not easy.
I am trying to carry on in an indefatigable way in my comps preparation. I have been reading a book a day for, well, a while now. I have 15 books left, which puts me right on track to finish reading with 3 weeks to just review. Now, I love reading - obviously. I have picked a profession where that is one of the main tasks. I find myself very fortunate that a regular, normal part of my life involve picking up a book, and getting lost in a world that is new and exciting. But is also hard to keep my attuned to the subtle differences in books on the same field and retain the arguments of each book (of over 100 of them for this test). I feel like I have created an entire filing system in my brain, and right now, there are a lot of filing cabinets! But I am pressing on.
It is like I am in the midst of marathon training. Heavy volume (quite literally - these are big books!), double days, just lots of time being put in. There is that one month of marathon training that pushes you harder than any other time. That is this month in terms of my comps preparation.
We'll look at this week as an example:
In my book that I read yesterday in preparation for comps (just under 6 weeks to go, if you're keeping track), So Great a Light, So Great a Smoke: The Beguin Heretics of Languedoc, the author Louise Berhman used the word indefatigable several times to discuss the relentless attitude of this religious movement.
I kept saying it to myself - in part to get the pronunciation correct (it's hard, right?), and in part because I couldn't stop thinking about its meaning.
I like that word a lot, and I wonder if sometimes we are called on to be indefatigable. We practice and practice running, doing long runs, tempo runs, intervals that get faster and faster with each subsequent lap, in the hopes that even as the hours and miles pass, we will not tire. We seek to find the perfect balance in challenging ourselves and improving our threshold, but at the same time not allowing ourselves to burn out from the intensity. It is not easy.
I am trying to carry on in an indefatigable way in my comps preparation. I have been reading a book a day for, well, a while now. I have 15 books left, which puts me right on track to finish reading with 3 weeks to just review. Now, I love reading - obviously. I have picked a profession where that is one of the main tasks. I find myself very fortunate that a regular, normal part of my life involve picking up a book, and getting lost in a world that is new and exciting. But is also hard to keep my attuned to the subtle differences in books on the same field and retain the arguments of each book (of over 100 of them for this test). I feel like I have created an entire filing system in my brain, and right now, there are a lot of filing cabinets! But I am pressing on.
It is like I am in the midst of marathon training. Heavy volume (quite literally - these are big books!), double days, just lots of time being put in. There is that one month of marathon training that pushes you harder than any other time. That is this month in terms of my comps preparation.
We'll look at this week as an example:
Monday, September 12th
: 30 minutes on elliptical, weights, strength, core
Sisters and brothers of the common life : the
Devotio Moderna and the world of the later Middle Ages
Tuesday, September 13th
: 2.5 mile warm-up; 6 x 150 meter strides; 6x 1200 meters; start at 5:12
and cut down 3-5 seconds per interval; 400 meter jog between each interval; 2.5
mile cool-down. Total: 11.25 miles
The Laity in the Middle Ages: Religious Beliefs and
Devotional Practice
Wednesday, September
14th : 30 minutes on bike, weights, strength, core
start Possible Lives
Thursday, September
15th : 8 miles easy
finish Possible Lives: Authors and Saints in Renaissance Italy
Friday, September 16th
: weights, strength, core
Literacy in Lombard Italy c. 568-774
Saturday, September
17th : 2 mile warm-up; 6 mile tempo, 2 mile cool-down. Total: 10 miles
The Last Days of the Renaissance
So Great a Light, So Great a Smoke: The Beguin Heretics of Languedoc
Sunday, September 18th
: 15.6 miles easy AM, 3.4 miles easy PM
Images of the Educational Traveler in Early
Modern England
start Corpus Christi: The Eucharist in Late Medieval Culture
Weekly Totals:
48 miles, c. 180 minutes cross-training, 7 books and counting
Held on strong this week. Lots of reading, lots of running. Will try to stay indefatigable for another week!
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Like coming out of anesthesia
...I'll explain the title, I swear
Last night, I had another track workout. I can't believe how hard they've been, back-to-back-to-back. I don't know if I'll have a workout with 7 minute miles again (not counting tempo runs - those tend to be around 7:00 miles) - things start at 6:55 pace and get faster. Obviously, it's helping and getting me more comfortable to the faster times, but it is still hard work.
Anyways, this was last night's workout: 2.5 mile warm-up; 6 x 150 meter strides; 6x 1200 meters; start at 5:12 and cut down 3-5 seconds per interval; 400 meter jog between each interval; 2.5 mile cool-down. Total: 11.25 miles I had read The Laity in the Middle Ages: Religious Beliefs and Devotional Practices in the morning, so the run had to wait until after work. It was still hot at 5, so I kept working on my book, and headed out at 6:20. It is always a bit unnerving when you're sweating during the warmup. Thankfully, the shade had covered the majority of the track, so even though it was hot, the sun wasn't going to fry me. I got through the first one in 5:09 -- woo! Better slow it down. Sarah says if you go too fast on the first one to just try to match the time again for the second interval. But nope, 5:06. I then matched it again: 5:06. I felt pretty tired at this point, and still had 3 intervals to go. The 400 meter recovery laps just go by so fast! The fourth was 5:05, and I felt like I was pushing to just knock off one second. Then the dreaded penultimate interval - always the hardest one: 5:02. Okay, the end is in sight. And when I took off for the last one, it was like coming out of anesthesia. I was becoming more aware again and I knew that the end was near. During regular runs, I have lots of thoughts - medieval, my life, the world, anything. But during fast intervals, my mind is just so focused, and almost devoid of any thoughts whatsoever. And in that sixth and final interval, I was starting to wake up again. 4:58 baby! My average pace for the 6 1200s was 5:04, which translates to 6:47 pace. Yippee! And just a few days after a fast 5k, I will take it! I was just so happy that the heat didn't melt me too much, nor did I ever slow down during the set. I felt so awake and alive during the cool down - running is really what gets me going. And even though it was 7:30 at night - that was when I was most alert on Tuesday.
In other running news, today would have been the day for me to sign up for Boston. I had 10 minutes to spare with my BQ, but I will not be signing up today or tomorrow. I will not be running a spring marathon, and I will not be running the Boston Marathon, which is a weird feeling - I have done it the past 2 years. But it is part of the plan - to focus on the shorter stuff, and then come back to Boston Marathon in the future. Part of my heart will still beat for Boston, it's just on hold for now.
Today's run was the coolest I've had probably since I left California - 71 at the start. "Baby love" by the Supremes was playing - a good way to start the day!
Last night, I had another track workout. I can't believe how hard they've been, back-to-back-to-back. I don't know if I'll have a workout with 7 minute miles again (not counting tempo runs - those tend to be around 7:00 miles) - things start at 6:55 pace and get faster. Obviously, it's helping and getting me more comfortable to the faster times, but it is still hard work.
Anyways, this was last night's workout: 2.5 mile warm-up; 6 x 150 meter strides; 6x 1200 meters; start at 5:12 and cut down 3-5 seconds per interval; 400 meter jog between each interval; 2.5 mile cool-down. Total: 11.25 miles I had read The Laity in the Middle Ages: Religious Beliefs and Devotional Practices in the morning, so the run had to wait until after work. It was still hot at 5, so I kept working on my book, and headed out at 6:20. It is always a bit unnerving when you're sweating during the warmup. Thankfully, the shade had covered the majority of the track, so even though it was hot, the sun wasn't going to fry me. I got through the first one in 5:09 -- woo! Better slow it down. Sarah says if you go too fast on the first one to just try to match the time again for the second interval. But nope, 5:06. I then matched it again: 5:06. I felt pretty tired at this point, and still had 3 intervals to go. The 400 meter recovery laps just go by so fast! The fourth was 5:05, and I felt like I was pushing to just knock off one second. Then the dreaded penultimate interval - always the hardest one: 5:02. Okay, the end is in sight. And when I took off for the last one, it was like coming out of anesthesia. I was becoming more aware again and I knew that the end was near. During regular runs, I have lots of thoughts - medieval, my life, the world, anything. But during fast intervals, my mind is just so focused, and almost devoid of any thoughts whatsoever. And in that sixth and final interval, I was starting to wake up again. 4:58 baby! My average pace for the 6 1200s was 5:04, which translates to 6:47 pace. Yippee! And just a few days after a fast 5k, I will take it! I was just so happy that the heat didn't melt me too much, nor did I ever slow down during the set. I felt so awake and alive during the cool down - running is really what gets me going. And even though it was 7:30 at night - that was when I was most alert on Tuesday.
In other running news, today would have been the day for me to sign up for Boston. I had 10 minutes to spare with my BQ, but I will not be signing up today or tomorrow. I will not be running a spring marathon, and I will not be running the Boston Marathon, which is a weird feeling - I have done it the past 2 years. But it is part of the plan - to focus on the shorter stuff, and then come back to Boston Marathon in the future. Part of my heart will still beat for Boston, it's just on hold for now.
Today's run was the coolest I've had probably since I left California - 71 at the start. "Baby love" by the Supremes was playing - a good way to start the day!
Monday, September 12, 2011
Arlington 9/11 Memorial 5k - Beautiful Race
Saturday night was my first race of the season (as Sarah was calling it, my rust buster): the Arlington 9/11 Memorial 5k around the Pentagon. I have only done one other night race - it is a weird feeling! As nice as it was to sleep in, I felt like I was waiting all day to start! While there was a holdup on the metro (which didn't really help with my nerves), I got to the race in plenty of time. I had enough time to do a 20 minute warm-up, which loosed me up. I was nervous because (well, I could come up with a bunch of reasons) it was so hot (80), and I am not a good heat runner. But, I saw on my warmup that there would be a spot of shade, so I could hold onto that thought.
We got corralled in, and they actually had markers to have people stand to separate everyone according to pace (6:00-6:59, 7:00-7:59, etc). I thought this was great - I had never seen that for a 5k, but since there were so many people, it was totally worth it. I was a bit nervous, because even though I stood in my appropriate spot (6:00-6:59), there were only 2 other women around. I had looked around online, and I didn't think I was going to place quite that high.
The gun went off, and off we went. There was the general swirling around me, but I settled quickly into a pace. We hit the first mile around 6:40, and I was a bit doubtful of how fast I was going to run - I was already hot. Felt very grateful when we hit the water stop around 1.5 miles in - dumped 2 cups on my head. I was wearing very bright clothes, and I knew I was up near the front of the female pack, because I got a lot of "go girl" comments, and then someone even yelled "5th woman." Wow - in a DC race? Hit 2 miles around 13:25. A girl ran alongside and said, "I'm going to try to stick with you." I grunted a "thanks" but not too long after, she passed me. It was just hot, and the goal was to just hang on at that point.
We approached the Pentagon, which had the sun streaming on it - very beautiful and moving. Just felt so blessed - I was able to run - I was able to run in a place that receives threats and there is currently high security at. I was able to run because I am blessed with that ability and because there were others out there looking to protect us. How could you not be grateful and moved during this race?
I used all of my energy to just keep going, and the finish line finally came into sight, what a relief.
21:02 (6:47 pace)
6th woman (out of 2244)
90th person (out of 4217)
Wow. Not a PR, was off by 18 seconds, but given that it was 80 degrees, I will take it. I was really pleased with my performance. I ran fairly even splits, and placed high in a DC race. It was a good performance, and Sarah says a good start to the season. Next race: Clarendon Day 5k on 9/24.
This was a very moving race. I was very happy to be a part of it.
On Sunday, I had a 13 mile run, which I felt so sore during all of it. It is remarkable how much running 3.1 can tire you out for 13. But, I kept going, because I felt like I was running with a lot of inspiration on 9/11. I am a very different person than I was 10 years ago. I was living in my hometown, now I am in DC. I was a high school kid who now is running in a different world. Freedom is only free because others work to protect the rest of us, so for that I say, thank you.
The gun went off, and off we went. There was the general swirling around me, but I settled quickly into a pace. We hit the first mile around 6:40, and I was a bit doubtful of how fast I was going to run - I was already hot. Felt very grateful when we hit the water stop around 1.5 miles in - dumped 2 cups on my head. I was wearing very bright clothes, and I knew I was up near the front of the female pack, because I got a lot of "go girl" comments, and then someone even yelled "5th woman." Wow - in a DC race? Hit 2 miles around 13:25. A girl ran alongside and said, "I'm going to try to stick with you." I grunted a "thanks" but not too long after, she passed me. It was just hot, and the goal was to just hang on at that point.
We approached the Pentagon, which had the sun streaming on it - very beautiful and moving. Just felt so blessed - I was able to run - I was able to run in a place that receives threats and there is currently high security at. I was able to run because I am blessed with that ability and because there were others out there looking to protect us. How could you not be grateful and moved during this race?
I used all of my energy to just keep going, and the finish line finally came into sight, what a relief.
21:02 (6:47 pace)6th woman (out of 2244)
90th person (out of 4217)
This was a very moving race. I was very happy to be a part of it.
On Sunday, I had a 13 mile run, which I felt so sore during all of it. It is remarkable how much running 3.1 can tire you out for 13. But, I kept going, because I felt like I was running with a lot of inspiration on 9/11. I am a very different person than I was 10 years ago. I was living in my hometown, now I am in DC. I was a high school kid who now is running in a different world. Freedom is only free because others work to protect the rest of us, so for that I say, thank you.
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